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Girlfriends acknowledging your small penis


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Do you ever sometimes wish that your girlfriend or wife would just come right out and tell you that you have a small penis? I haven't had many sexual partners, but none of the ones I've had would ever think of telling me that they thought my penis was smaller than average. I realize they were afraid of hurting me, but sometimes I just wished they would acknowledge it in some way and then assure me that they still found me sexy. I know from measuring that my 5" is a bit on the small side. I know it's not too far from average, but it is small nonetheless.

 

I guess what I'm saying is that it would put me to ease to just talk about it instead of trying to pretend that she didn't notice that I'm an inch or two shorter than her past partners.

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Have you considered the fact that the difference in your respective sizes was not something she even considered, at least not to the point where it actually bothered her in the slightest---especially if she really cares/is "into" you?!

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Do you ever sometimes wish that your girlfriend or wife would just come right out and tell you that you have a small penis?

 

My current girlfriend is the first who has actually said to me, "Yours is the smallest penis I've had". I'm about 5 1/2 inches and have always known I'm smaller than average... to tell you the truth it hurt (me) being told I'm the smallest... I mean, how do you feel knowing that everyone she's had sex with has had a bigger chap than yours. Makes you (well me anyway) feel inadequate.

 

The annoying (brilliant) thing is she loves me, tells me daily, but I can't get this f*ing notion out of my head that all that matters is bloody size...

 

Way to go first post... :-)

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My GF didn't hesitate to tell me I was small.Not on the first night,but soon after.She also doesn't hesitate to talk about big cocks,either one she's experienced,or ones she's seen(she's a nurse).So as you can imagine,she's seen them by the hundreds.

 

I had the exact same situation, this girl I loved and cared for, told me I was the smallest man she ever saw. And she would tell me about big cocks and stuff....and I would think to myself while she was telling me this..." is this a psico girl??? or what??? would she even consider the posibility that this could hurt me???? how could she tell me she loves big cocks and such...if I do not have one????

I know, some would say....hey...she loved you....and stuff....

but....ya right....if your GF was on the heavy side...would you go on and tell her...I love slim women, I love the way their waist and hips feel, their flat stomachs....that would be mean....

A couple women had left me wondering... are woman mean??? not all off course...but....are they stupid??? or are they plain mean????

Do not worry about her....but I would consider a change..because all though she says that she loves you....in the least...there could be a twisted personality flaw in her...perhaps she enjoys pushing needles into your mind.....

I only know that although I loved that girl, and she said she loved me too, her constant cock talk, w disregard to the fact that I told her in a nice way that I was not interested in hearing about it , her constant talk was hurting me, I felt humilliated to the point that it was unhealthy. A woman that loves her man, would not say crap like that, unless she loves him, and at the same time, she has a nut loose.

All I am saying is, you do not have to go for that. Worse of all, if she loves big stuff, sooner or later she will fall for one.

We have to respect ourselves in order to demand respect.

 

To women, how would a female feel if I was telling her all the time....I love slim women...... shocked.gif ( while obviously she were not)

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My first girlfriend had never been with another man and she told me she thought I was huge. My next girlfriend was more experienced......she never mentioned how my size compared with her other lovers. That gave me a clue that they were either bigger or we were about the same in the size department.

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Even though i'm very insecure about my size. I wouldn't allow any negative comments about it, unless it was done in an educated manner like trying certain sexual positions etc.

 

If a girl started ridiculing me about it, for me the relationship would be over. Just because you have a small penis, doesn't mean you are less of a person and deserve to be treated badly. Even, if i found out a girlfriend had told her friends about me being small, i would see that as a lack of respect.

 

Jonny,

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Thanks for the link. I can infer from reading the other extensive topic, that, when that girl ( in the link case , smallish's GF)...said.."I thought you liked listening about big dicks "....to me that is an affront in itself, if you are straight, because, I do not know of straight men that like to hear stories about big dicks. Perhaps there are the ones that get turned on, I can see it would be a turn on to see a woman penetrated by a monster penis... but from there to have my GF telling me this stuff....every occassion she felt fit....

What I think is that some women when confronted w a man w a small penis, seize the situation to gain control. By reminding a guy that he is small, the woman has the guy "by the balls". Really, every man and woman knows that size in a man is a very sensitive issue, and, not that important, unless you go to the extreme cases, like a man w a small penis ( I say that, because a man w a 8 in has little to fear about stories....)...but if you are bellow a certain size, it becomes unavoidably material.

The wrong kind of woman will seize the opportunity. I guess that is what my GF did.I felt humilliated, and in a way, she made me think for a while, "I should be so gratefull to her, she is putting up with me, I am a wimppy pecker looser"

Women do not have anything remotely close to this thing, a man w a small penis has to run away from a manipulator like that.

And, the comment that "I thought you liked to hear about big dicks" is full of poison. Would I tell a girlfriend who is on the overweight side...."I thought you liked hearing about gorgeous bodies" the only way I would believe that is if

1) She told me so in person

2) She is a open bisexual woman.

3) I were to have some twisted sense of humor or sense of sexual arousal that would make me believe telling my loved one... " I saw this gorgeous mermaid of a woman"...."her small waist felt delicious"... I had a GF that made Pamela Anderson look like a prepubertal girl"...etc etc etc...was going to turn her overweight body on!

Only if I were 15 y/o.

So, it is not us, but the combination of our characteristic in this penile department, and their controlling personalities.Conquering woman that wants to have you by the balls.

And I also think that it is an exit valve for a woman that feels she can not deal w a situation. Perhaps she likes you, or, needs you financially or psicologically ( perhaps she had abusing BF's, she likes your good side)speaking..but she is not come to terms w her penis expectations...so by reminding you of your size...she keeps the " hammer by the extinguisher" close to her. The size issue can be used to finish it all fast.

In other words, a weapon against us....

I have been hurt in this way more than once, that is scared my mind.

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well, that is the beauty of insecurites you can emphasize with the other person. Having a small cock , certainly make you more level headed and down to earth. If i had a huge penis, i'd be a different person perhaps very confidence and even boarding on arrogant. Alot of large men get worshipped and it gives them an uncontrollable ego and they can't keep their dick in their pants.

 

My friend who is hung like a donkey is a prime example. He can't help but cheat, i don't think he's ever been faithful. Still i can detect some envy in my post -_- ahh if you want a faithful boyfriend then your best of with the small guy in general- im selling our small cocks to the female members. As irrational, animalistic people we aren't designed to be faithful only our superego keeps us in check or a small penis insecurity smile.gif

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john roberts, you are correct in your last comment. I know my small penis kept me from sticking it where it didn't belong. I had guys in college make passes at me and while I am str8, I was also curious but never did anything for fear of being teased. The same with other girls. My wife is the only one i've ever exposed it to (sexually). Other men have seen it, a few teasing comments when I was younger. Anyway, my insecurities were kept at bay knowing that my wife had never been with another guy. But a few years ago, she confessed to me that she had had an affair years ago with a good friend, and yes, he was bigger. That is what has really got my insecurities out of wack. She assures me that sex with him was not as good as with me and she never had an orgasm with him, but still it's been hard (no pun intended) to realize she had a bigger one inside of her. The one good thing that has come out of all this, that while my wife has acknowledge my small penis insecurity, she has assured me that she loves me for me, not my penis, but also that she loves my penis...all 4 inches of it and that's all we need!

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Really, every man and woman knows that size in a man is a very sensitive issue

 

Or maybe she was telling the truth and genuinely thought he was turned on by it. Women don't know about the degree of sensitivity size issues are to men. We're not socialized about it, no one tells us and we don't think about it.

 

Lotsa times we're too busy worrying about what he thinks about our fat thighs, fat butt, no butt, fat belly, doggy jowels, saggy boobs, no boobs, too fat, too skinny or a whole host of other things we know many guys find unattractive.

 

Unless guys take the time to educate us we just won't and don't know how touchy a subject penis size is. To assume women have the same level of knowledge and understanding of the issue as men tells me there are things about women's socialization you aren't aware of yet.

 

Hy.

About your comment, about her being genuine ,about thinking that her BF really wanted to listen about physicall descriptions about big penis endowment , size and all, is not plausible. I doubt it. Coming from a teen ager, maybee. An Adult woman in the western hemisphere , has seen several men, and she can see for herself that men are sensitive about it, because, if her current man is well endowed, she will notice the confidence. Is the current BF is small, she will detect the level of confidence. Girls talk, and, girls know. In the case in question, the woman is a nurse, so, she has contact with different bodies, she listens to comments and girl talk, the opinion of a rocket scientist is not needed, for her to understand that her BF is small, and, if she were to love him , she should not make comments that would hurt him. I knew, long time ago, that men better stay away from making comments about the weight of a woman. Specially talking about weight ,when the woman with us has weight issues. In the same way a weight comment would not affect at all a woman w a beautifull body....to a heavier woman...all the way from the slightly over weight to the obese...a comment about weight would be the equivalent of tying myself up to a tree, and giving her a set of axes....she would brake me in pieces....if not physically...she would dislike me. There are exceptions , off course, the overweight women that care less, and the slim woman sensitive to any negative comments ....but the rule is a rule. In the least, if she is a very nice person, she would not show her pain, but she would suffer , and it would be cruel on my part to talk about something like that. To talk about gorgeous bodies with her.

I think we human beings are messed up. It is human nature to be mean. Men do it to women, about their weight, a defect, we human beings use stuff as means to control.

Goes both ways. The only ingredient here that is really determinant , is the fact that, obesity,breast size , nose shape, muscles,color of hair, lips, everything a woman has that could be subject to criticism, has a way to be improved, while, women know that there is no way to do anything about penis size. So, back to the topic, it is extremely cruel to do what that woman did, and to do what my GF did, and other girls, I could bring more examples....

I do not think you guys want to know....but if I have brains to think that I would have to be insensitive, or brute, or an a$%$##@le to tell a woman....stuff that would hurt her....why is women tell this things???

Perhaps it is us,what fault is she have in my size??? none whatsoever....so she could claim....if you are small...it is not my fault....it is your problem!!!

...yes...it could be my problem, it is , but, decency and common sense is not something that is deleted by the prescence of a flaw....so...if a woman is fat...I will not bring comments about gorgeous women....the fact she is fat....will not do anything to my common sense and quality of being human, so...having a small penis is no green light to humilliate.

It hurts...I wish you could understand....it does.

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so...having a small penis is no green light to humilliate.

It hurts...I wish you could understand....it does.

 

I don't doubt you at all. I understand it hurts. One only has to look at this site to see that. One has only to see someone like littlecrk (a good man - it makes my heart weep to see him hurt so) to see the heartache. Just because I don't have cancer doesn't mean I can't feel for a cancer patient's pain. Same thing for a guy wishing he had a bigger stick.

Thank you very much Segassaurus....I know you care, and, forgive me if I sound a little high strung sometimes, I apologise if I ever come on too strong, all I want to do is show you this side of the coin. I appreciate you being around and listening. You do not have to do it, my respects, please , just see through what could appear as a argumentative person, which I am not, I am a very nice guy, but this topic, this is a topic in which I just want to help others ( men w the issue) , w my own experience, and, in case of ladies like you, whom are giving me the honor of being heard ( read ), whom are giving me the honor of your time, I just want to communicate to you how difficult and material this issue is.

 

Like you said, all that penis enlargement spam...is designed to play on our fears.

I just wish there was a counter culture to all that porn, penis enlargement and trash business industry. I am afraid, women are just spectators, and, like you said, many do not know about the facts, and, on top of it, they get indoctrinated to believe men are big.

 

I just realized in your response, how a great person you are, thank you for your time. I feel honored.

 

 

[Edited to repair broken opening quote tag.]

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littlecrk, I noticed your signature and just wanted to say good for you! Hang in there! About six years ago I peaked somewhere above 250 lbs. I got down to 155-160 and have been there for a few years now. It was hard at first, but habits change and now I love healthy food and look forward to working out. It's done wonders for my self-esteem to get sexual interest from women again.

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Isn't it interesting that men assume that they can never really understand how women think, but they also assume that women understand exactly how men think. We don't tell women how sensitive we are to penis size issues and how psychically threatened we are by guys with bigger dicks, we just assume that they know.

 

The reality is more likely...

    women see hugh dicks in porn,
    women know that most porn is made for and sold to men, so
    women assume that all men must be interested in the exploits of guys with big dicks.

That's my guess, any way.

 

 

Alan G

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This is really interesting, Alan. Your observation makes me want to question my friends.

 

I feel like I have always known that guys were this sensitive about genital size. Actuallyno. Not quite this sensitive. I had no idea how much time is wasted worrying about flaccid size, and comparison to old lovers, even ones who were never brought up. I certainly never talk to new lovers about sex with former lovers unless they bring it up and ask questions, and since I have only ever been attracted to really confident men, they've only ever asked because hearing turned them on. I have never had some insecure man harrassing me about the size and skill of men from the past. I think the only reason I ever had any idea how touchy this subject can be for men before coming to this site is because my very first boyfriend was so shy about size. He was about 6", maybe 4" around (this is going back eleven years, so with a grain of salt)and flat-out refused to let me see him flaccid. I never once saw him flaccid, though I really wanted to. Imagine. You're a 15 year old girl, and you've never seen a penis in person before- not a mature one anyway. How curious do you think you'd be? Plus, you think you're in love, and the young man who you're all wrapped up in isn't comfortable just hanging out naked with you, or even getting totally naked for foreplay. For me, his insecurity was contagious, and it wasn't long before I turned it around on myself, worring more about my fleshy thighs, the jiggle under my triceps, my pot-belly, errant hairs on my legs, my coke-bottle glasses, the gorbechevesque birthmarks I have on my body, the little elevated hair follicles on the backs of my arms and upper back and on, and on, and on, and on... until I realized none of it had anything to do with me. He married a very reserved woman. Perfect for him. She, I imagine, will have no desire to experiment with his flaccid penis. She will never see him as anything other than strong and confident. Anyway, none of my other partners were like that. They seemed completely unconcerned about their sizes. The most sexually confident ones even seem to be the smaller ones. The least experienced ones were usually the bigger ones. There is one, larger than average, who worries a bit about size, wants to be rated on general performance, and ranked in comparison to all others. It was only after he asked me to do that that I even thought about who was the best, and in what order I'd put them all. Before that it was really more like, "Wow. Sex is usually really awesome. I've known some hot guys!" And I think, if my first boyfriend had not believed himself to be small, and had not refused to be seen flaccid, I never would have ended up on this site.

 

I ended up here because the one time I encountered a truly unusually small penis, I didn't know how to talk to the guy about it because I was afraid of badly hurting him, and instead of having an adult conversation with him about my concerns I freaked out privately and subsequently refused his calls.

 

There was never anything in smallish28's old post that had me fully convinced his girlfriend was being sadistic, especially after numerous private conversations with him. I have always wondered if she has known, as I have, men who wanted to hear about other men's fantasies, other men's penises, what my other sexual experiences were like, and so on.

 

The men on this site are very touchy about what the women on this site say. I was once lambasted for describing a "nice, thick" penis or something like that. But it's perfectly acceptable, I notice, for men here to equate large breasts with being gorgeous, or to have entire threads where women are reduced to one pair of body parts (ones we obsess over the way you obsess over your johnsons), or to equate overweight women with being "not the best looking". Interesting.

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I always wondered how the situation with your girlfriend had progressed smallish. What is it like now?

 

 

It's going well.She doesn't come up with the 'cock of the week' stories anymore.Though she,from time to time,has talked about her 12 inch ex.The guy was such an anomoly that I guess she can't help but mention it.But she doesn't do it in a way like she's humiliating me.And I am interested in her previous experiences.The guy was part of her past,I don't want her to NOT talk about her past,unless she started insulting me by saying 'he's so much bigger and better in bed than you' etc.

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smallish....that is great. I am glad it did not end up in a split.

About BB comment on flaccid states and such....yes...to me that is something foreign....to me ...personally....being straight...I could not care less about others ' guys opinions about my penis.

 

I say this because although I feel unconfortable in a locker room w Mr Cock walking up and down the place, shaving and brushing their teeth walking naked all around the place showing off. ( yes, I think they show off, there is no need to walk around, use the pay phone in the locker room, standing naked, but I do not care..)...I could feel unconfortable....but unless this are my close friends, I do not care. I say close friends, because once, only once, I ended in a fist fight w a close friend.

 

Years ago, I used to run miles daily, but after a car accident, my knee needed therapy...no running for about 6 mos..(now I am running again...Thanks to God..)...and this friend was a swimmer. He convinced me, and I agreed...waiting all those mos would be a disaster for someone used to exercising...so I started swimming. We used to go to the YMCA pool, and, we swam for one hour....straight hour...it was great.

Well, after swimming, showers, and I did not care at all about my little dick...well, I cared...but not to the point of hidding....

well, one day, in front of some aquantances, and girls included, he makes the comment, ...."1/2 man" and started laughin....and I said....beg a pardon...what are you talking about??? and the girls ears turned to radars....the last thing girls are going to imagine is..."1/2 man" small penis....it sounded more like, 1/2 man...that I was gay or so....and...no offense to gay people, but if you are staright, you do not like to be called gay....so...I asked him again....because the girls were all trying to find out...and I was very direct to him...what are you talking about....do you want to put me on the line??? He backed down...and everything got put in place....nothing happened there....but this isiot, did it again at a party, in front of friends....all men...and then again told him off, but he would not back down and started making fun of me....and it did it,, fists flew and got ugly....( fortunaltelly I did boxing and tae Kwon do since a kid...so I can defend myself,,,). I have only been involved in 3 fights in my life, this one was one of those, and I had no choice, some people think that humilliation is fun...unfortunaltelly for this guy...he chose the wrong guy to do it .

 

 

Back to the topic...my concern is girls. I would not cover my flacid size at all, that would be ludicrous....( no offense to those who do)...what is important is the erected size, that is what will be of use.

I wish all women were like Diane or BB in the sense that you are sensitive and exercise good judgement , but not all girls are like that. Once a friend of mine told me, Dude, your GF is talking crap about you...and I kept asking him.....and....guess what...took me like 3 weeks and beers one eve to get him to tell me....he was more protective of me, friendshipwise, although a man...than the woman that professed love to me....he tells me...that...and he warned me....he said that she was telling everyone that I had the smallest cock she ever saw.....

 

And this was coming from a girl that was kind off overweight....

 

I took it in stride....and...no need to reveal to my buddy the actual size I had.....I told him..( jab back at my GF included)...it is not that I am small....it takes more than the usual size to go through all those rolls....kind of mean...but....I was forced to safe face.

 

We never talked about it, and I never told this stuff to no one else...but when confronting my GF...she said she did not say anything...later on....when I told her I had a witness, she confessed...and apologised...

I understand I might be the one and only one smallest guy many girls will see....but from there to make it public joke...and laugh at my expense????

 

I find it difficult to believe that that many girls do not know how sensitive a guy's size issue is.

To make a comparison....any man that has been w two or more women...knows that there is levels of beautty...body wise....fece wise...etc...and in the same way men are preocupied w muscle, strenght, developing raport to talk to girls...( as a rule, off course exceptions exist) women are more into beautty, looks, faces, eyes, bodies, weight....different things....so....back to the guy w at least two girls in his resume...he knows that he can not tell or cassually talk to a girl he likes, to his GF...about the beautifull eyes , gorgeous body, long sexy legs, etc..etc...etc...the "other" girl has.

 

And, just to illustrate, the example in smallish's case.....if I were a male nurse....what would my GF , and women in general, were to think...if I were to say ....to her.....""there was this girl w this gorgeous round breasts......her nipples were so nice.....

or ....her groin was so flat and devoid of fat...her pussy was so beautifull""....I could bring in a zillion comments...all of those would be uncaring, insesitive and mean....unless my GF was the last month's playboy issue pet of the month.

 

 

Can we agree w the girls here that not all women are nice and sensitive??? What would be needed to educate women in this aspect??? ...like I said...men know they better stay away from making weight comments to a girl, any woman...for that matter. I learnt that long ago.

 

Just to finish...yes, this friend of mine had a GF, she was a cool girl, we were friends, I was her favorite friend from amongst her BF's budies.

I was into running, , exercising and being healthy....and they come to a friends place...that couple, and more people, and they said, lets get pizza......so I say, no, pizza is not the best stuff...lets get something else.....and...she asks me....why not pizza????

... and I tell her, in a friendly and caring way, look, pizza is not good for us, it is full of fat....you should not be eating this stuff....

wwWWWOOOWWWwww!!!! she got ballistic....you ....YOU...are you telling me I am fat!!!!!

Lord....I tried to explain to her, but she got enraged...she hated me.....she berated me and there was no way to make her understand....so...my good friendly advise resulted in me being mean and insensitive.

What is the girls think??..and guys... everyone and everybody...

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Dude, this might be a bit off tangent, but small cock doesn't always equal lack of confidence. The same as a large cock doesn't always equal confidence.

 

Okay, back on topic...my first gf mentioned to me the difference between her larger first and my size using her fingers. "He was this long and this thick," she told me one day. Funny thing though, she must have liked my size because she didn't leave me over it. I was 15 and she was 14, so I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and chalk it up to immaturity. smirk.gif

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littlecrk, I noticed your signature and just wanted to say good for you! Hang in there! About six years ago I peaked somewhere above 250 lbs. I got down to 155-160 and have been there for a few years now. It was hard at first, but habits change and now I love healthy food and look forward to working out. It's done wonders for my self-esteem to get sexual interest from women again.

 

Thanks it has been a long journey started in jan 2004 when I weighed 343 pounds.

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I always wondered how the situation with your girlfriend had progressed smallish. What is it like now?

 

 

It's going well.She doesn't come up with the 'cock of the week' stories anymore.Though she,from time to time,has talked about her 12 inch ex.The guy was such an anomoly that I guess she can't help but mention it.But she doesn't do it in a way like she's humiliating me.And I am interested in her previous experiences.The guy was part of her past,I don't want her to NOT talk about her past,unless she started insulting me by saying 'he's so much bigger and better in bed than you' etc.

 

Well that is great to hear smallish. I must admit when I read your original post I was feeling very insecure about my size and it felt like, "if his girlfriend feels that way then maybe mine does too secretly", yet still the post kinda turned me on. I am feeling much better these days (in part thanks to this site) and I have talked to my girlfriend about it quite a bit which helped and now reading your original post it just turns me on. smile.gif She obviously loves you and wants to stay with you and talking about sex in a way she thought you would like was just to add 'spice' to your sex life. Not something you want to hear all the time (especially on the days you are feeling insecure) but it seems most men get just as turned on visually (if not more) by a larger dick and if your cool with it that can be fun too. smile.gif

 

Ha ha, reading over this post I'm not sure what I am trying to say. smile.gif Well I'm glad you and your girlfriend are doing better (I was really interested in your story) and I am also glad that I am doing better as well.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Actually my girlfriend has hesitantly acknowledged my size after a few years,

 

She is 28 and had only had 2 other lovers one in high school and one in College,

 

early on she told me they were not much longer than me at 4.5, one was my size and the other was just a bit longer, estimated at half and inch longer by her, and the other one was "thicker" and hurt her too much, at that time I was the "perfect" size

 

But like the other girlfriends that are nurses, she quickly learned that 4-5 is a bit below average,

 

The first time she saw one it was, "Wow you should have seen how big it was", "wow it was big", and "I did not know they got that big, I mean it must have been like 10 inches"

 

I responded with, "well it is not the norm" and she said all the girls talked about it and visited him often,

 

then a few months later she saw 2 big ones in one day and came home and said "I thought you said it was not normal to be that big?", I played dumb and said, well I though so, and she replied with well there were almost 5-6 or so in the past few months over 8 inches, it is not all that rare"

 

It was official after the girls were talking about the toilet paper tube test, the nurses said that it was the measure of the below average guy if they did not fit and go out the end,

 

She was excited to get me to try to find my averageness and the look on her face after i fit inside and did not reach the end was disappointing, she was surprised and said "oh goodness", since then the talk of size has been non existent

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