wuerstchen Posted June 17, 2009 Report Share Posted June 17, 2009 "Skittish hottie seeks guy with tiny penis Date: 2003-11-01, 9:21PM PST Have you been crippled by your fear of rejection ? Spent hours in front of the mirror with a ruler in one hand and Gray's Anatomy in the other ? Grown a pot belly because you are too inhibited to brave the locker room ? Your life is about to change. Gentlemen, I know exactly what I want in life: a sweet, good natured,nice looking man, intelligent, well-educated, with a great sense of humor, good hands and, best of all, a...tiny penis. Actually, good hands and the tiny penis is an acceptable start (see below). Not a typo my friends. I've thought about this carefully. I'm a beautiful -- some even say hot looking girl with long flowing blonde hair, an engaging grin a great body and healthy interest in sex...but listen to me. I want an appropriately-sized penis attached to my man. No more of the 10 inch wonders. And believe me, they might be statistical outliers but they are sure as heck all coming my way (NO pun intended). And I can't take it anymore (STILL no pun intended). Here's the deal. I don't like 'em. I don't think they are sexy. They don't turn me on. I don't want one inserted into any of my orifices. In fact, I don't really want to be in the same room as one, clothed or unclothed. They are a menace and should be regulated by the State of California. And yes, Ouchie Voodoo Penis Hurts. I want to make sure that you don't think I'm anti-penis in general. That would be a grave misstatement. I've had a lot of bad experiences with men of the donkie-kong variety -- both on the omigod, i've never felt pain like that before scale, as well as the weird affect that having an enormous penis has on a man's character development -- and what adds insult to injury (if I may put it that way) is the guilt trip engendered by that terrible moment when Mr-DK unveils the collosal appendage he is no doubt so proud of, smiling proudly like a grade schooler unwrapping a present, to be faced with my (at best) blank stare. What I DO like is a nice, firm, enthusiastic, perky 3-5 incher. So, perhaps not technically "tiny". But a penis with some savoir faire, some subtlety. A penis that is unobtrusive but quietly competent. Knows its business, knows its place, gets the job done...happily for all involved. Ever heard (or said ?) the phrase "More than a mouthful is a waste." Yeah, exactly. So, my friends and countrymen, bring me your tiny penises and I will cherish them. No replies without photo (penis photo not required). No STDs No marrieds No weirdos Nothing longer than a coke can or wider than a Pez dispenser Thank you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nubdick Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 sounds extremely fishy to me. either a setup or a guy posing as a girl. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoughPoint Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Why assume the worst? Her post sounds perfectly plausible to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wuerstchen Posted June 19, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Why fishy? I am married to a sexy woman who feels the same way. And her first husband was well hung, but a jerk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canuck45 Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Sounds like a measurectionist doing some PR work...LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bredero Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 I agree with cannuck hehehehehehehe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parker80188 Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Maybe a guy trolling, but probably just a girl who vastly overstates her looks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
big guy Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 I agree with wuerstchen, my gf is the same way....and she may not be on any vogue, cosmopolitan, or Vanity Fair covers any time soon, but she's pretty darn cute and adorable! (of course, if you ask me, she's the bee's knee's![is that how you say that?]) Though she has no experience with large ones.....she's seen a few...(one in a Hard Rock Cafe....jeezz.....had her and her mother flabbergasted just retelling the story) and she'd take my tiny one hands down! Foursquared 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riftalope Posted June 23, 2009 Report Share Posted June 23, 2009 1- Bee's knees. One apostrophe. "Beez neez" 2- It's likely real, just like guys liking big women. 3- You sure they weren't at the Rock Hard Cafe? Ha-ha! Hands down! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nolongerhere Posted June 24, 2009 Report Share Posted June 24, 2009 The rock hard cafe? no, lol, def. the Hard Rock cafe. It was so shocking, I didn't know what to do! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 "Skittish hottie seeks guy with tiny penisDate: 2003-11-01, 9:21PM PST No weirdos Nothing longer than a coke can or wider than a Pez dispenser Thank you I was not surprised to find this ad in the "best of craigslist" jokey ad section. http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/18656006.html You've been punked IMO. :popcorn: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nubdick Posted June 25, 2009 Report Share Posted June 25, 2009 told you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 1, 2009 Report Share Posted July 1, 2009 Yup. Obviously phony ad. Most of you are rather poor at detecting trolls, from what I've seen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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