more comfortable naked around men or women?

[tanman]

After a long absence from the site, I just posted a response about the question who you feel comfortable being nude around? My answer was briefly that I never used to be at all, but since I met my wife's family I'm much more comfortable with it.

 

This got me thinking: are those of us with smaller members more comfortable being exposed to men or women?

 

I'm genuinely curious what you guys think.

 

I used to be uncomfortable around anyone, pretty much, but my in-laws semi nudist lifestyle has made me much more confident and open.

 

I now usually have less of a problem being exposed, certainly not around family. I will without thinking walk around naked, since other people do it regularly around me. We all swim naked in the family pool, and I barely give it a thought.

 

But I do have to admit I am still more conscious around females than males.

 

The men in my wife's family have a variety of shapes and sizes, so it really makes little difference how big I am, since it's just another piece in the variety package.

 

A few months ago, I was talking to my dad in law and my youngest brother in law after swimming. The former is smaller and stubby (it sort of sticks out from a tuft of hair), the latter is rather large (dangles and swings, rather thick). It was only after the fact that I even thought of the differences.

 

But being around the women in that family can still make me conscious. I don't think any of them have ever smirked or made negative comments, but for some reason I feel more AWARE that it is 'out there' for them to see. I think that has more to do with me, of course, but interesting nonetheless, even after all these years.

 

It certainly isn't about sexual attraction to any of them, but I sometimes feel conscious that 'it' is there, and I even have to shamefully admit that I every so often feel a little swelling going on. . .

 

I have been naked around them lots of times without a thought, but for example a year or so ago I was in the usually common situation where family members take turns with morning showers. When many of us are in the house, we need to do this quickly, so there tends to be and 'overlap' of one person getting out and the next person getting in. It is usual for us to see each other naked in the process.

 

When it is 'one of the guys,' I don't usually have a conscious feeling. I usually just 'see' a tuft of hair and a bunch of dangly things:-)

 

But this time it was one of my sisters-in-law. Again, in most cases I don't see a dangly things down there, but a tuft of hair down there and the dangly things up top. . .

 

This time, I was, for some reason, incredibly conscious. I don't think she gave it a second thought, but I caught myself staring. The tuft of hair seemed very prominent, the breasts very bouncy. Again, not attraction per se, but just awareness of it.

 

And so I was aware of myself too, and felt conscious of thing. In just the brief moment of passing, I started swelling up. . . thank God I got past before it was obvious. . .I felt SMALL for some reason. . .

 

Thoughts from anyone else?

 

[BradScott]

While I have no experience in co-ed, family nudity, the central issue of whether one feels more comfortable naked in front of men vs. women is defintely of importance to me.

 

I can get undressed, walk naked to the showers, then back to my locker in front of a large number of men at the gym with absolutely no concern.

 

I can go to my male doctor, turn my head and cough, bend over ... you guys know the routine ... without any embarassment whatsoever.

 

But a few years ago, I was in the hospital, quite ill. I was mortified when a nurse's aide wanted to give me a sponge bath. I always declined, and sick as I was, I feebly tried to do it myself. If there had been a male aide available, I would have allowed him to bathe me without hesitation.

 

This isn't exactly a sexual thing. It seems to me that in general, men just don't care what I have between my legs. And I don't particularly care what they think about my junk, anyway. But let it be a woman, and I'm all paranoid ... is she judging me? ... is she going to gossip about me with her friends and coworkers?

 

Maybe it's just the fact that I understand men better than I understand women, at least when I'm naked.

[jester02]

In general, I think women are much more judgemental than men about size issues so I'm less comfortable being naked in front of a woman, especially, funnily enough, when the situation isnt necessarily sexual. e.g. nude beaches etc. Having said that that's a small discomfort, in the scheme of things I dont mind too much who sees me.

[Guest]

I am completely comfortable being nude around other men, but absolutely uncomfortable being nude around women (in fact, I've never done it and never plan to).

[Nubdick]

i'm uncomfortable being nude period, even when its just me alone getting out of the shower. whenever i have to have an exam and its a woman, i start to have a panic attack and force myself to not freak out, throw up or whatever. and i may be imagining it but i swear i always see them smirk.

 

this last time, she grabbed my balls told me to cough and the whole bit, and she said something to the effect of that "well THOSE are normal"

[toadfish327]

I am more comfortable nude around women, I think other guys may judge me more on my size than a woman. I am nude more around men in the locker room, showers, etc. I don't get to go nude at resorts or clothing option palces nearly often enough. When I get a massage, the therapist never sees me completely nude and always draped unless she is working on an arm, leg, back, etc.

 

I think women judge other women on their bodies more then than they judge their men or any men.

[canuck45]

I would say in general I don't have a 'preference' in comfort. If its all strangers I couldn't care less one way or another (nudist camp). Amongst people I know it depends on the people.

Edited March 19, 2011 by Guest

[TinyJock]

Interesting question. Never really thought of it before. I'd have to say it's situational.

 

When I was younger, definitely women. As a teenager, when things approached the grand unveiling, I'd panic and blurt out excuses why we should STOP! and keep our clothes on. I was an early pioneer in the abstinence movement. It's amazing I ever lost my cherry! (Thank God for my first wife, the cunning vixen!)

 

My first wife's family were a bunch of nudists and I can remember the initial trauma of standing bare-assed naked before a bunch of women, especially my mother-in-law. Especially since the rest of her family, her father and sixteen year-old brother, were fairly well hung.

 

On the other hand, I was always extremely self-conscious in the shower rooms after sports -- although I made sure not to show it --particularly when around a few guys I was extremely competitive with. I was sure this one guy was always smirking whenever he'd check my junk out. So I guess it evens out.

 

Now, I still have a bit of self-consciousness with either sex, but it's no big deal anymore. In fact, I'm a bit of an exhibitionist.

 

While we're on the subject: When I was small, before puberty, I have no memory of being bothered by being naked at all, even though I had observed other kids my age were a lot larger. Small, yes, but still they had some dangle. But, as soon as I started to shoot up, shave and get hair on my chest, I became obsessively paranoid about my father seeing me naked. I'd lock the bathroom door and go to great lengths to make sure he never saw me. I guess I feared he'd be ashamed of me or something, that I wouldn't meet his expectations. Both he and my older brother were fairly well hung. I had no similar feelings about my older brother, even though for a short time he had unmercifully teased me about my size (compensation probably, since although he was two years older, I was the dominant.)

 

What was really strange, however, was that I had no similar fears concerning my mother. I can remember on a trip with her to my aunt's and uncle's, feeling no self-consciousness whatsoever about my mother seeing me coming out of the motel shower. It didn't bother me even when once I had a rash in the groin area and my mother, an ex-RN, checked it out.

 

Never understood why I should be so obsessively fearful of my father seeing me naked, yet, conversely, very comfortable around my mother.

[Guest]

I DISHONESTLY pretend I don't care just as effectively around women as men or men as women.

 

My impression is that men are the more judgemental, but except for the most primitive cases, hide their judgement, but then subtly integrate their judgement into the relationship whether it be passing or daily activities.

Edited March 20, 2011 by Guest

[RoughPoint]

I'm with TJ, Canuck, and others who say that it depends on the situation. For me it's more about that than whether the other people are male or female.

 

I am frequently naked among men in the locker rooms at both of the clubs at which I work out too infrequently. No issues. No one says a word at the health club, and at the country club, everyone teases each other with good humor. No surprises there.

 

I have never been a nudist, per se, but I have enjoyed a number of nude beaches. My wife prefers to stay covered, and she wishes I would, too. I don't, and again, no issues (for me).

 

When I lived in the Northeast, my brothers-in-law made fun of me constantly about all sorts of things pertaining to my non-Irish body. It was good natured, and we all got along very well. Being naked in any kind of social setting with my sisters-in-law, however, is unimaginable.

 

Sorry for running on too long, but let me end by saying that I am self-conscious about many of my physical attributes, and the size of my penis is not chief among them.

[redbear52]

The only women who see me nude these days are my wife, and the occasional female I accidentally flash while changing clothes after canoeing, kayaking, or swimming.

 

I am not particularly self-conscious, and if public nudity was accepted I don't think it would bother me to be seen naked by either men or women, but as it is not I find it a little uncomfortable if a woman happens by while I am shifting clothes. It is more out of concern that they will be embarrassed.

 

Changing clothes in locker rooms or in all-male settings doesn't bother me.

[Guest]

I'm with TJ, Canuck, and others who say that it depends on the situation. For me it's more about that than whether the other people are male or female.

 

I am frequently naked among men in the locker rooms at both of the clubs at which I work out too infrequently. No issues. No one says a word at the health club, and at the country club, everyone teases each other with good humor. No surprises there.

 

I have never been a nudist, per se, but I have enjoyed a number of nude beaches. My wife prefers to stay covered, and she wishes I would, too. I don't, and again, no issues (for me).

 

When I lived in the Northeast, my brothers-in-law made fun of me constantly about all sorts of things pertaining to my non-Irish body. It was good natured, and we all got along very well. Being naked in any kind of social setting with my sisters-in-law, however, is unimaginable.

 

Sorry for running on too long, but let me end by saying that I am self-conscious about many of my physical attributes, and the size of my penis is not chief among them.

 

Guess not! You are very well hung! It might be relevant to mention that now and then, especially for casual readers who otherwise would think you are an amazingly well adjusted under-hung guy!. . . I'd forgotten myself 'till I just checked your stats.

 

[5taR]

I am almost completely comfortable nude around women, and not at all with other men.

 

I've found the extent of most women's view of the importance of penis size ranges from mild curiosity to an estimate of a man's capacity as a lover, which does not bother me too much.

 

Men on the other hand, tend to view size as a representation of our very masculinity.

[canuck45]

Image walking in with a 8" flaccid penis and everyone goes "OMG LOOK AT THAT THING". He could kill someone. Believe it or not it works both ways, possible the women may say that more than the men,

[Nubdick]

i wish

[RoughPoint]

Sorry, Lloyd. It has never been my intention to deceive. In my defense, I am not an infrequent contributor to the forums, and I would not be comfortable beginning every post with, "Big Dick says: ...". It seems to me that's what profiles are for.

 

I do try to say that I am not a smaller guy when I think it is relevant to my post, or when I think my point of view might be different because of that. Obviously, I missed here.

 

I recognize that I am a "guest" here, but I do try to make a positive contribution.

 

By all means, everyone just carry on! I didn't mean to hijack the thread.

[canuck45]

However, does your comfort stem from knowing you have an average+ penis (the penis makes the man), or is it just confidence in yourself that allows you to be nude in public.

[RoughPoint]

Locker Room: We're about the same age, so I presume we had a similar experience. After P.E., we would undress and walk naked to the gang shower area. After washing, we would be handed a towel on the way back to our locker. This was repeated every day.

 

I expect men to be naked in locker rooms, and I truly don't give it any thought. Honestly, if someone is markedly small or large, I notice, but that's about it. I don't think I could tell you to whom that "equipment" belonged the next day.

 

At a (nude) Beach: I think knowing that "I'm okay" down there makes it easier for me. But who on a nude beach doesn't expect to be seen? If you have a problem with that, you're not there!

 

As I've said before, I'm not entirely comfortable with my body, and being at a nude beach is partly about acceptance. (I'm hairy, not tall, etc.)

 

My dick is my dick. It's the only one I've ever had, and likely will ever have! I'm aware that it is larger than average, but I can't say for certain how I would feel with something else because I don't know. I'm not sure if this answers the question, but I've tried.

[Frodo46888]

I'm self-conscious being naked in front of anyone, since I'm not built like anyone's dream date. But although women are more sympathetic to most situations, I would much prefer to be seen naked by a man. For some weird reason, I think a man "understands" my lack of endowment more than a woman would. Some of them might not be any bigger than I am!

 

 

[Riftalope]

I've always felt that when people reacted to nudity they were "acting silly". Always. Vulcan logic on the television only gave me a word to sum up how I found all the hiding and theatrics. Then again, I only found out a few months ago that I have the mildest form of Asperger's Syndrome. (Formal speech with early lingual development, over-focusing on an activity or subject, had to learn not to stare.) I might naturally understand things differently. I saw right away that most people reacted to nudity because they're TAUGHT to react. Any reaction. Shame, shock, even pride. Most often a learned response. I've seen people learn the better response of casual. They learn by example.

 

When it comes to gender I don't have any problem other than a first time if I'm alone. That's because my inner thoughts tense up hoping there isn't an overreaction. Few men get loud when they see nudity, even if they react negatively. I'm also hoping there's no misinterpreting of reason. My nudity isn't an offer. If I were just looking for sex I'd put on a suit and tie. More women find me sexy in that.

 

That said, I've found two effects from being nude around women, and I think Tanman might be encountering them too. First is primal visual stimulation. Frankly, it's not the front of a man's mind that looks at women. It's a built in design that we notice difference and movement. The body responds in anticipation of being needed.

 

Men notice, in the back of their minds, the lack of a penis and even fall for a double check. At the same time thinking of the penis we DO have. (Ding!) Then men notice movement, breasts, nipples. (Two more -Ding! Ding!) Then the mind in front catches that 'something' is calling for attention. What is it? Oh, it's a nude woman! (DING-DONG! "Sir! Penis going to standby mode! What are your orders?") Then you think about her seeing your penis. (Ding!) Don't touch it. (Ding!)

 

The second effect is olfactory. It plays much like the visual theme with a more insidious thing called lingering. That's when your nose keeps finding the scent. The nose says, "Hey! You know that friend of yours is a woman?" (Ding!) "She's got pheromones!" (Ding!) "And perfume!" (Dinga-ding!) That's when the front of the brain stops to acknowledge that there is perfume. (Ding!) You wonder why the penis is standing up. You even try not to think about- (Ding!) "Oh, another molecule of pheromone shook loose. BAM!" (Ding! "Sir! Are you SURE Penis should abort erection?" ... Ding!) She's not even in the room any more. (Ding!...)

[anxious_guy]

once i get rid of that little bit of stomach-fat, anyone :-) anyhoo, if i start swimming, i'll go in for the non-existent speedos thing!

[Rick]

Anyhoo, if I start swimming, I'll go in for the non-existent speedos thing!

 

Hey Guy!

 

Anyhoo, too, we have a gay, nude beach here, conveniently located within direct view of the house, where you can get in lots of practice! :smirk:

 

Rick

 

 

 

[anxious_guy]

rick, i may just take you up on that :-)

[soxislife]

I am very comfortable being naked around men, but not at all comfortable around woman.

 

I walk around the locker-room at the gym in the nude. Taking my shower and sauna.

 

I've noticed with female massage therapists that I like to be completely covered by the blanket. But with men, I prefer to be completely natural.

[MicroCock47]

I prefer being naked around women, but being nude around other men is not a big deal. My primary care doctor is a female; as are most of the specialists I go to. I have no problem being nude in front of them; as they all are professionals.

Peace