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Happy or Jealous? Your son is better hung than you.


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On 9/3/2019 at 1:18 PM, Triasco9.5 said:

@JamesD I'd actually challenge the notion that the reaction was instinctual (probably because I'm a sociology major). Typically when I've seen or heard of kids "saying the darndest things" or committing some type of social faux paus, it's due to a lack of social education or a specific lesson taught by those around them. 

Modern instinct phobia.  Everything is social construction.  Ideology, not science.

Of course it would be "nice" to overlay primitive instincts with social training.

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@JamesD It is a science; It's called Sociology. The study of people, groups, and societies. These things are social constructions, otherwise, there would be no reason for them to change across time and space. That's why cultures changes.  It might be easier to accept human cruelty or stupidity as simply an irrefutable matter of instinct, but it makes more sense to me that we reify constructions with the power of instinct (or whatever driving force you believe in) and then refuse to acknowledge just how flimsy our reasoning for it is. Sociology does not fear instinct. On the contrary, the debate of "nature vs. nurture" has since been resolved with the realization that they are not mutually exclusive, nor can they be. 

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@Triasco9.5  You got me with the verb "reify."  To the best of my recollection I have never before heard or seen that word.  I had to look it up.  On the assumption that I'm not the only one who is unfamiliar with the word, here's what I found.

reify: verb transitive
   to consider or represent (something abstract) as a material or concrete thing
   to give definite content and form to (a concept or idea)

Even at the age of 75, I can always learn something new.

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23 hours ago, Triasco9.5 said:

@JamesD It is a science; It's called Sociology. The study of people, groups, and societies. These things are social constructions, otherwise, there would be no reason for them to change across time and space. That's why cultures changes.  It might be easier to accept human cruelty or stupidity as simply an irrefutable matter of instinct, but it makes more sense to me that we reify constructions with the power of instinct (or whatever driving force you believe in) and then refuse to acknowledge just how flimsy our reasoning for it is. Sociology does not fear instinct. On the contrary, the debate of "nature vs. nurture" has since been resolved with the realization that they are not mutually exclusive, nor can they be. 

Irrelevant answer.  I didn't say nor imply that there is "no social construction."  Nor did I say social construction is impossible for the purpose of moderating primitive instincts. 

Modern instinct phobia is real however and goes back to Rousseauian "noble Savage" nonsense and Marxian "New Man" dreams.  Explains the anger, rage and intolerance of the Left.

Basically reification means "make real."  

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Awareness and reaction to status in hierarchy along the various variables is instinctual if nothing else is though a socially constructed veneer over it is possible and has positive aspects.

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  • 1 month later...

My husband and I decided to have a kid 10 years ago. My husband is taller than me (im 6'4" he is 6'7") and also much larger down there. His6" soft (8" hard) penis put my little micro to shame. When we were discussing having kids we agreed to mix it up and let nature decide who would be the biological father. Our son Sebastian was born in 2010. It was obvious that Rudy, my husband, was the bio dad. Sebastian is now almost 8 and I am happy he inherited his dad's size. It was only awkward once when we went to a local pool and showered after. Sebastian looked confused when he saw my innie and asked what happened to it in front of other dads and my husband. I was mortified. 

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Yeah, it's a problem.

Of course, you should be happy for well-hung young relatives.  Being or expressing jealousy would be way out of bounds.

The problem is that a well hung kid often will have an instinctive and peer generated disrespect that interferes with any mentoring that might otherwise be appropriate.

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@dallasman I think that it's certainly normal to think about the size of your son if you're self conscious of your own penis and wonder if your son will also be smaller.  But I find many of these posts rather distasteful in the length at which they go to describe their son's genitalia.  It borders on creepy and arousal based and I think not the thing that should be encouraged on a board

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  • 3 weeks later...

@THREEPOINT5 I hope you don't consider me part of the distasteful aspect of these accounts of overly descriptive narratives. I purposefuly kept my descriptions to a need-to-know basis. I apologize if anyone thinks it was vulgar. My intent was only to show the happenstance of our biological differences in the conception and later developments of our son, who thankfully, inherited his larger father's genetics. I think most of us know the self-imposition that having a smaller penis causes. I was trying to illustrate my gratitude to nature: that my son won't have the same self-doubt that, I, a man with a small penis, have dealt with all my life. I am happy that his penis, more than likely (can't say for certain), won't inhibit him the same way my lack of endowment has. 

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@dallasman I think you sentiment is understandable and noble, but that self doubt can manifest in so many ways.  I'm sure everyone  here is aware, but a large cock (or any trait society considers desirable) isn't always a vaccine against doubt or depression. Only a healthy mind and perspective can do that. 

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If I had a son, which I don't,  I wouldn't be jealous that he is bigger than me, most guys are, I would be happy that he is in good health, all parts are where there supposed to be and he has a nice looking penis. Other than that he would be born the way he was supposed to be and it is what it is

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On 7/25/2020 at 5:37 AM, dallasman said:

My husband and I decided to have a kid 10 years ago. My husband is taller than me (im 6'4" he is 6'7") and also much larger down there. His6" soft (8" hard) penis put my little micro to shame. When we were discussing having kids we agreed to mix it up and let nature decide who would be the biological father. Our son Sebastian was born in 2010. It was obvious that Rudy, my husband, was the bio dad. Sebastian is now almost 8 and I am happy he inherited his dad's size. It was only awkward once when we went to a local pool and showered after. Sebastian looked confused when he saw my innie and asked what happened to it in front of other dads and my husband. I was mortified. 

This sounds interesting.  Do you explain how you arranged this birth somewhere?  Here?

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  • 2 years later...

My youngest (blood son) came out as I was, a baby with a longer one.  As he became a teen, his flacid was as mine.  Only accidentally caught a glimpse of him erect as an adult, and he is from what I caught in that glimpse, at least my dimensions.  I have no feelings pro or con as to our comparison, but in conversations he has admitted to his comparitive size, and says that he is pleased with it.  That is what is important for me. 👍

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On 6/7/2020 at 11:51 PM, Triasco9.5 said:

I asked my mother (quite recently, actually) about penis size in our family. I asked my father of course, but he was never around and to this day still has yet to have a meaningful conversation with me. But I've done my best to foster a relationship with him. In any case, he seemed to have no idea about size in general, let alone our family. My mother said that my father was the man with an above average penis, but it wasn't overly large like mine. She then proceeded to assuage what she thought were concerns of mine by telling me not to worry and that many women prefer larger sizes. Gotta love Moms. lol.

I had a chuckle over this. I've never had a chat with my parents about penis size. Can't ever imagine doing so. Too embarrassing. Especially with my Dad. He gave me total love and complete support, always encouraging me, particularly in sports. I knew he (like my brother) was well-hung. After puberty, I was completely paranoid about my father seeing me naked. I was terrified I'd "let him down" with my small cock. Apparently he sensed this as he took greater care giving me privacy at home than my brother. Thinking back years later, I remembered that after games he'd wait until I'd finished showering and was fully clothed before coming into the locker room to congratulate me, unlike other fathers who'd barge right in.*

Totally different story with my mother. I had no problem whatsoever about her seeing me naked. We once took a three-day, two-night automobile trip to visit my father who was overseeing a project out-of-state. I never worried about her seeing me getting out of bed or out of the shower, etc. I should note this was long after I'd reached physical maturity. Kinda weird I guess; for most guys it'd probably be just the opposite, okay with their fathers seeing them, not their mothers.

 

* "Privacy" in the locker room varies from institution to institution. I'm always surprised how many non-team related people show up in lockerrooms -- "authorized" or not -- and that's not counting the so-called "reporters" (male AND female). Heck, we had two "towel girls" working in my college locker room (one of whom I had a class with). As a noticeably under-endowed athlete, being exposed like this to complete strangers was embarrassing. Plus, on top of that, we had our fair share of (mostly gay) "looky-loos"; they made no effort to be subtle about gawking, typically looking first at your crotch, then your body or face. 

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16 hours ago, TinyJock said:

I've never had a chat with my parents about penis size. Can't ever imagine doing so. Too embarrassing.

When my mom got older she completely lost her sense of what was appropriate to talk about. One day my wife and I were visitings and somehow we got on the topic of sex and I mentioned my wife and I didn't have sex very often. My mom pipes up and says, "At your age, your daddy and me were doing it 4 or 5 nights a week". Then she looks at my wife and says, "I sure hope it grew since the last time I saw it. If not, I can understand why you don't want it". Then she goes on to talk about how both my brother and I were small and how big my dad was. My wife was so embarrassed she just sat there in silence. 

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18 hours ago, SloStroker said:

When my mom got older she completely lost her sense of what was appropriate to talk about. One day my wife and I were visitings and somehow we got on the topic of sex and I mentioned my wife and I didn't have sex very often. My mom pipes up and says, "At your age, your daddy and me were doing it 4 or 5 nights a week". Then she looks at my wife and says, "I sure hope it grew since the last time I saw it. If not, I can understand why you don't want it". Then she goes on to talk about how both my brother and I were small and how big my dad was. My wife was so embarrassed she just sat there in silence. 

A friend of mine named Hal was legendarily well-hung.*  He took after his father in that respect. His father had died when Hal was quite young. After his mother -- whom he always referred to by her first name, Alice -- remarried a few years later, she'd frequently drop into conversations how much bigger his father was and how small his much younger and good-looking stepfather was.  As a teenager, Hal would often awake in the night to hear through the bedroom walls her belittling his stepdad's manhood.

Years later, whenever Hal and his wife would go back home to Alabama for a visit, his stepfather would have to temporarily vacate the guest bedroom where he'd apparently been banished for his shortcomings. Hal actually felt sorry for his stepdad, whom he described as a thoroughly nice guy, and admitted Alice could be an acid-tongued bitch at times. On the other hand, he never seemed to lose pleasure in reciting the tales of his father and stepfather's unequally-sized weapons as they reflected favorably on his own prodigious endowment, which was also the subject of countless tales. He particularly delighted in cuckolding smaller-hung males.

*He had an excellent PR firm: his own word of mouth. Like many well-hung men, the size of his cock -- affectionately referred to as "Big Bertha" -- was an endless source of fascination and the center of conversation for him.
 

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13 hours ago, Appreciater said:

@TinyJock Sounds like the guy wouldn't have much of a life if it wasn't for his dick.   In a way, I guess he should be pitied.😐

You'd think so, but Hal's one of the most interesting men I've ever known. He's a born story teller and raconteur with a soft, Southern drawl, the type who can keep a gathering or dinner table entertained for hours. He has a strong, forceful personality, the natural leader of his many friends. It's the problem of posting on sites like this that by necessarily concentrating on a single aspect of a person or a situation, we often give a false and incomplete impression. What I described is just a part of his personality and conversation; there is so much more to him. He's tall and slender and, though not classically good-looking, is irresistibly attractive to women. . . and men. I'm sure that attraction is based as much on his personality as his big cock. 

Hal and I were extremely close for a good three years. We were "best buds", always in each other's company; you wouldn't see one of us without the other. We took vacations and cruises together. What many would call a "bromance". We did everything but sleep together. (Well, technically we did sometimes, but not in the strict sexual sense. . . unless you count cuddling! LOL) *

He and his wife celebrated Christmas with my wife and me one year, staying the night. I remember our exchanging inappropriately expensive gifts under the tree. . . And that was the last we heard of each other for nearly a year, until one evening Hal called as if nothing had happened, no time had passed, like it was the day after Christmas or New Years. What caused our mutual rupture I never learned. We remain close friends, talk on the phone for hours, but only hook up two or three times a year. We've never addressed what caused the breakup; the only mention was one brief cryptic remark of regret on his part about the mistake of not having kept in contact, something to the effect that I was a "keeper". Interestingly, Hal didn't seem to recognize that I had also failed to maintain contact; in his mind, it was a completely a unilateral act on his part. 

 

* I'm a strange duck. I'm equally capable of strong affection and bonds with women as with men. Although those with men do not include overt sex, I'm sure psychiatrists would discern a strong element of latent homoeroticism. (My wife does!) I've always felt this stemmed from my long participation in sports. 

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5 minutes ago, Appreciater said:

@TinyJock ....... Could it be that he felt as though he was getting a little Too close to you.? ...  🤔

No, not in the obvious sense. Hal was, like me, basically straight but wasn't shy about having a "bi" streak. He occasionally made it with men, particularly good-looking, straight, blue-collar working types with small dicks. Heaven for him was fucking the guy's wife at the same time. His all-time favorite was a "smoking hot" blond house painter with a killer body and a tiny dick, whose wife was a cute Latina.  I once asked what was the appeal, and he replied, "I love being bigger and better." (Why be surprised or scornful? I'm thoroughly obsessed by my small dick. Why else am I here? Why shouldn't he be obsessed by his big one?)

But, yes, maybe in the sense that "getting too close" means sexual and/or romantic attraction. But I still don't know why that would be a problem for him. I don't think Hal ever had a qualm about his "bi" side. We'd often been physically affectionate without any negative reactions from him.  When single, I'd often slept over at his one-bedroom townhouse, which entailed sharing his his kingsize bed. As I said, this could involve some affectionate "cuddling". He'd obviously enjoyed this. So, again, I don't see how this would be a problem for him.

Much more a problem for me. I do have a physical, gut-level reaction when sensing things are starting to cross the boundary line between "affection" and sex with men But why then? Maybe I sensed somehow I was getting "a little too close to him", that I felt myself approaching that boundary line, even desiring it. Dunno. I don't remember any thoughts along those lines at the time. 

An interesting question. 

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