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Small Penis Envy


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I just had a chat with a well=hung guy on DinkyDick. His penis is column-like, long and slender, 8.5 inches erect. He has left me many compliments on my little hairless one over the years. Today he told me that he wished he had a smalll penis like mine, and how lucky my wife was. I've found that many of the compliments I get on my pictures on xhamster and dinkydick are from guys who are well hung. My wife, praise the lord, is also an enthusiastic lover of my little one, and thinks that large penises are unattractive. She is especially enthusiastic about fellatio, and finds my small penis, with its slender girth, ideal for sucking.

Anyone else have much experience with well-hung guys with small penis envy?

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Since I started coming on the internet, I've chatted or messaged with many guys who are into tall, fit guys with small cocks like me, but, until the other night, never encountered one who wanted to have a small one himself. Surprised the heck out of me. 

Like you, I've hooked up with women who are turned on by small cocks, not necessarily for purely sexual reasons, but psychological ones. My wife falls into the latter category. 

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My wife of over 40 years has never complained about my small size and has often said she wouldn't trade mine for all the money in the world. She says it fits perfectly in her mouth or in her vagina.

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This thread should be a “Sticky” on the top of the list. Just as a lot more guys are coming out and overcoming the fear or ridicule by their peers by admitting they prefer small breasts I have found that on sites like fetlife that more and more, women and guys are admitting they prefer a small penis. Not only for sexual reasons but for aesthetic reasons.

I for one used to keep my mouth shut when out with my guy friends and they were gawking at a girl with huge breasts about how I felt they looked gross and prefer smaller breasts, for fear of being laughed at. I’m sure that situation regarding guys with small penises is more common than we might be aware of.

I am amazed at how many more positive comments I am seeing on photos of guys with small penises recently and it seems to be growing. There will always be gals who prefer larger penises as there are guys preferring larger breasts but the disparity may be smaller than we think.
 

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Seems to be human nature to assume bigger is better, whether that is penis or breast size. Clearly that's not always the case.

I've known a few guys over the years with big cocks, one was quite shy and said he didn't like the attention he got in gym changing rooms/showers. Another was quite a loud brash type and would sometime whip it out after a few beers.

Female friends/partners who have shared their thoughts have said they prefer average size, easy to handle and not painful! While some might be attracted to the sight of a big one, the reality is quite different. Similarly some girls with big boobs would like something smaller, they don't like the attention they bring and can be uncomfortable. Smaller want bigger, and I know a few who have had implants.

One of the reasons I decided to share pics was to show average, and not porn star donkey cocks as average. I've had a lot of good comments.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I would definitely prefer my erect penis to be smaller. There's not so much to it when it's limp but I'd like that to be shorter too. I just like small dicks and would prefer to have one myself.

I wouldn't say I was envious though - for a long time I had a lot of anxiety that my dick was small and came to perceive myself as someone with a relatively small one. But small dicks always fascinated me. I always felt strangely in awe of anyone who could be naked in front of other people, whose dick was obviously small and who didn't seem bothered by that fact. Whereas I was always too ashamed to ever be naked in front of my brother once I realised my dick would never match his. So in that respect I felt like deep down they were better than me, because they weren't such cowards as I was.

So it isn't envy that I feel exactly. I know there can be a lot of pain involved in being small which isn't something to be envious of. In fact I've experienced some of it and it's through that that I've come to find small dicks attractive.

Edited by Nimmo
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  • 2 weeks later...

I guess I technically count as "hung" when erect, but I like smaller penises.  I don't know if envy is the best word, but I do enjoy the aesthetics of a smaller size and do believe it enhances the attractiveness of a man when I view them on a whole.  I do not get that same sentiment with larger or averaged-sized penises.

At times I do wish I was slightly less thick given my sexual experiences.  I have caused pain more than I would like to admit and it is far from sexy.  But I will admit that I am far from a good sexual romp, so I could take sometime to improve that aspect of myself haha.

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On 5/29/2020 at 4:01 PM, TinyJock said:

Like you, I've hooked up with women who are turned on by small cocks, not necessarily for purely sexual reasons, but psychological ones. My wife falls into the latter category. 

All the women I had on-going sexual relationships with claimed they liked smaller to avoid physical abuse often at the outset, but I always detected a psychological reason:  wanting the upper hand regarding sexual status.  They wanted me because of my lower sexual status.  Feeling of superiority?  Security? Power? Evolution to oral?

Most eventually revealed they liked vaginal and even giving oral with a larger penis through reaction to sex toys, group sex, or relating past experiences.  One told me about a group sex experience in which the other 3 girls wanted a shot sucking and fucking the biggest guy in the group, the guy she was with.  She  was proud he came back to her to blow his load.  She said she was proud one of the other guys finished with her too.

Just made me want to avoid group sex.

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Feeling of superiority? Security? Power? Evolution to Oral?    Also, resentful reaction formation to arrogance of guys with big cocks.  The same woman told me about a guy that fucked her all day again and again trying to prove he had the best cock in the world and he could make all women have the best orgasms they'd ever had.  She claimed he couldn't make her cum (but she let him fuck her again and again all day?). 

I believed her at first as she claimed our sex was better until several months later when I saw how much more powerfully she reacted to a large dildo than with me.  I sensed she just resented the guy, so good in bed, but had no interest being with her as a partner.  I did hear her talk to the guy on the phone once, turning him down for a sex romp, saying she had "settled down."  Clearly, he "couldn't believe it" telling her "ya gotta be crazy", etc.  She made a point of me knowing she was turning him down because of me.

Meanwhile our sex had evolved to oral.  No matter how good I thought our fucking might be at times, she was always quick to dismiss my efforts and insist on more oral and get angry if I wasn't eager, to provide it, too.  Once when drunk she complained that I never complimented her pussy like other guys did, "Saying some guys would say how nice and big it was implying they could fuck it any way they want as long as they want."  She said something like, "You only compliment my clit."  Yup, she did have a big prominent one.  Yeah, I guess I didn't compliment what I could hardly feel when it got hot and juicy!

All this is clear as a bell in retrospect, but at the time I had various rationalization to avoid awareness of her systematic patronizing regarding sex.  I guess I focused on the reality she wanted me as partner and considered me A-ok in that respect.  Also, secretly to my self and publicly, I think I was proud she had high status as a sex object for other men even though I couldn't participate fully in that reality.  I remember a momentary shock when we happened upon one of her ex sex partners, a thuggish biker guy.   When alone with him he congratulated me on the "great catch" I had made and started relating how she gave him his best sex experiences ever, oral and fucking.  I remember being relieved when she returned and interrupted his revelations!  Oddly, he was not mean, but actually seemed envious of me, probably assuming I was like him, arrogant with a big cock.

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I should factor in that this woman had deficits in beauty that may have militated against her qualifying to be a partner for some of the big cock guys in her life.  They probably thought she was a "good fuck" but wanted a woman of higher overall status for a life partner.  Bluntly, they thought she was "just a hot slut."

Thus, her settling for a small dick guy like me was about her finally settling for what was available.  Because of my low self image and sexual status I never had the slightest reservation about her face and figure, but, thinking objectively, no doubt others did.

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Interesting it took me decades to think about all this explicitly though I can see now there was some implicit emotional, subconscious knowledge on both sides all along.  I was supposed to be the intellectual, but she was far more aware explicitly on these issues.  Somehow I ignored that she had a real attitude about women clearly better looking than her.

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Telling that early in our relationship she pressed for getting into group sex clubs and vacations.  When I'd say I didn't want to compete with men, she'd say I was a spoil sport or ridicule me that I was afraid my gay side would come out.  She said she'd still love me even if I turned out to be queer as a 3 dollar bill.  Sometimes she would ask me if I'd ever thought about sucking a cock or getting fucked in the ass.

She only dropped the topic after AIDS became a big issue about 1984.

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@JamesD You are giving your experiences a thorough analysis.

I have known several women who have claimed that sex with a well-hung man did not result in orgasm for them. Yet they will all attest that it was “fun”, they “laughed”, they “fucked all night” etc. Asked if they ever complained about being frustrated to their hung lovers, the answer was uniformly “no.” On some occasions I can attest to their climaxes using dildos, extensions, or strap-ons. So I have always held their denials of climaxing as a self-deception.

In clinical terms, this is borderline personality symptomatology, also known as promiscuity, principally among women characterized by casual encounters, high frequency of partners, and high intensity engagement. Curiously, women with such traits CAN make faithful life partners. My wife was this way in her 20’s and early 30’s. I told the story about her trip to Maui over Xmas in the 60’s where she had numerous encounters. She told me many other stories of her adventures, in vivid detail that clearly aroused her in the retelling.

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8 minutes ago, canuck45 said:

So if promiscuity is principally among women, what are men most men then.  Sounds like the good ol' double standard.

A Canadian (U of Montreal School of Public Health) study of 3,208 men from 2014 found that men who had at least 20 female sexual partners were 28% LESS likely to develop prostate cancer and had a 19% LOWER risk of developing aggressive prostate cancer compared with men who had fewer than 20 female sexual partners. I got that from my urologist. It’s on the Internet.

Does that mean men have an excuse? “Well I’m trying to lower my odds of getting prostate cancer...”

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@wuerstchen I am actually this guy wanting to have a smaller cock!

I am pretty small when soft like 3 inches, but as I am a grower, it becomes pretty big when I am hard.

I like having a big hard cock but I prefer the idea of a very tiny soft cock, like a micro penis with only the head popping up of the bush.

It happens to me when I am exercising or when I am working from home completeley naked and the appartment is pretty cold in the morning. Looking at my cockhead surrounded by my pubic hair quite excites me and I wish I was always like this !

As I can have low hang balls, having a very small cock would be the perfection for me (having only my cockhead inside my bush and above my balls hanging very low :P !!)

For my erect state, I love my big hard cock and the sensation that I have when I touch it, but visually speaking I would not dislike if I was very small.

Sometimes I am not in full erection and I hold my  something-like-4.5-inch-dick in my hands and I have this cockhead that barely goes beyond my palm and I find it so hot ^_^.

I even masturbate sometimes very quickly so that my cock doesn't have the time to be full erect, and cumming with this semi hard cock that is barely 4 inches is so rewarding :P

But for the most common state which is the soft state, I like showing that I am not very big. At the swimming pool, I wear a very tiny Speedo. In addition to the exercise making my cock being very small in the swimming pool water, the very tied speedo emphasizes the shapes of my genitals and shows clearly how small my cock and balls are  (if people look at my speedo :lol:). I precise that my body is pretty fit so, somehow, it highlights my little thing inside my legs ^_^

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On 7/6/2020 at 2:39 PM, canuck45 said:

So if promiscuity is principally among women, what are men most men then.  Sounds like the good ol' double standard.

Was he saying that?  I don't think so.  I think he was saying that promiscuous women develop a mental condition he called "borderline personality" disorder or some such which involves self-deception about their orgasms.

Actually, this sounds like a more serious degradation of women than the "double standard" and  more like the "slut shaming" that women  are very sensitive and even militant about opposing  these days.  

I actually know nothing about this and will have to google around a bit.  Certain, it is possible that some women have a bad reaction to promiscuity based on up-bringing or whatever.
 

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Incorporated corrections posted later by JamedD.
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12 hours ago, Aerty said:

[F]or the most common state which is the soft state, I like showing that I am not very big. At the swimming pool, I wear a very tiny Speedo. In addition to the exercise making my cock being very small in the swimming pool water, the very tied speedo emphasizes the shapes of my genitals and shows clearly how small my cock and balls are  (if people look at my speedo :lol:). I precise that my body is pretty fit so, somehow, it highlights my little thing inside my legs ^_^

I remember feeling like that and doing the same before I actually had sex.  Traveling for a major Corp during a summer job during college, I paraded around hotel / motel pools like that.  I came to my senses after I got shot down by a female lifeguard I tried to flirt with who figured she was too old for me, estimating I was 13 or 14 when I was actually 19.  She was 18, just old enough to be working as a lifeguard for the pool.  I sensed she thought it was cute that I made a pass at her and remained friendly, but patronizing.

Heard her accept dates from guys 10 to 20 years older than her.

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18 hours ago, JamesD said:

I remember feeling like that and doing the same before I actually had sex.  Traveling for a major Corp during a summer job during college, I paraded around hotel / motel pools like that.  I came to my senses after I got shot down by a female lifeguard I tried to flirt with who figured she was too old for me, estimating I was 13 or 14 when I was actually 19.  She was 18, just old enough to be working as a lifeguard for the pool.  I sensed she thought it was cute that I made a pass at her and remained friendly, but patronizing.

Heard her accept dates from guys 10 to 20 years older than her.

You must have looked very young for you age, if the woman gave you 5 years less!

Maybe it was because of your small package! :lol:

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1 hour ago, Aerty said:

You must have looked very young for you age, if the woman gave you 5 years less!

Maybe it was because of your small package! :lol:

Yeah, that., which I wasn't hiding in the tight bathing suit, but much else too.

I hadn't actually dated yet.  I was in denial about my physical presentation and status, wanting to believe there was no reason I shouldn't start dating, blaming my lack of courage which I was going to "get over" with alcohol assist on these convenient business trips.

I was 6 feet tall and built decently but delicately muscled-smooth.  At 19 I was still quite boyish looking in spite of my height.  I had a weird, late and glacial puberty.  Didn't start getting chest hair until I was 25.  Actually, my penis never got any bigger than it was then.

At the same hotel, there was a pretty girl selling food and snacks around a "cabana?".  I talked to her and made the opposite mistake.  I assumed working there she must be pushing 16 or 17, but too young to sell drinks in the attached "cabana" bar which was handled by an old guy.  When I asked her out she was eager and said she knew how we could get in some empty rooms to watch TV and have fun.  She asked if I could get liquor or beer and I said sure.  Then she said I'd have to go introduce myself to her uncle, the manager of the hotel  She said he had to approve her dates and we'd have to pretend we were just going swimming or to the game room or something.

Well, he almost called the police after checking the register to see that I was a "working man" paying for my hotel stay with a major Corp commercial account.  Turns-out the girl was only 13!  I apologized and he admitted the girl looked a lot older.  Finally, he thanked me for being above board and said he was having a hell of a time keeping his niece out of trouble!

I went back to the cabana and scolded the girl a little for not telling me her age.  I finally mentioned mine.  Now it was her turn to be shocked, she had assumed I was 15 at the most, vacationing with my parents!   She wasn't deterred though!  Now that she knew I had a rental car and could buy liquor, she wanted to figure a way to sneak out when her uncle was away from the hotel, drive around, drink and "park" somewhere.  Nope, I wasn't ready for jail.

I was learning more than I wanted to know about myself that summer.  I only managed to have one date that summer when a younger trainee at the Plant asked me to "double date" with him because he didn't have access to a car and I had the air conditioned rental car.  I guess it was a double date so there was something in it for me.  Oddly, we went to a race track for a cheap dinner but didn't gamble and then parked so the other 2 could "make-out".  "My date" and I couldn't help watching from the front seat some of the action which included removing the girls panties and him dropping his pants around his ankles revealing a large erection 6" or more.  This was before porn, believe it or not, so I was really surprised at his size and the willingness of the girl to fondle and even suck it.  

My date and I got out of the car finally and sat at a park picnic table to "get to know each other."  She was amazed I had such a good job and would soon be an Engineer, but clearly did not want a Summer fling with an out of towner.  I tried to feel her out about dating for the rest of the Summer and doing a lot of fun things.  She had been pleasant up to then but really put me down hard when I pressed a little even mentioning I didn't expect her to "put out" motioning back to the car.  She said, "Look it's been fun talking to you, but you aren't my type, period.  Don't take it personally."

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Didn't occur to me at the time, but she might have been insulted or thought I wasn't masculine enough as I made no physical pass at her nor even any sexual suggestion.  She might have thought I was hopelessly shy and backward, maybe even "a queer".   She was dressed quite provocatively, even showing cleavage.  Looking back she might have been needing sex that night, but was one of those who wanted the man to take the lead and be dominant.  That didn't even occur to me at the time.

The next Summer a supplier was at the hotel with his daughter.  She was overweight and not very attractive, but exactly my age.   She asked me out and insisted we park right away so we could get to know each other.  She threw herself at me and quickly introduced me to french kissing which was great.  She somehow positioned her leg so she could feel my little erection quite often, too.  She'd also rub her pussy on my leg.  It felt like a hot furnace.  I felt I was being given the "go ahead" signal so I cupped one of her big breasts.  She absolutely forbade that as it was something she was saving that for marriage.  She'd let me stimulate her vagina with my leg but not my hand.

When I violated her rules a little she'd always rebuke me sharply, but go right back to making out on her terms endlessly.  We dated for the whole Summer and for a time after I graduated, too.  One benefit was that she was rich, being the daughter of the owner of the supply company.  She paid for a lot of really classy activities and took me to elite private clubs.

 

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The best looking guy in my high school class, he was tall 6'1", Nordic good looks, someone who could be a professional model/actor was a micro penis. We had lots of talks about it over the years. He at first thought about suicide, once he realized he would never get any bigger than 1in/3.5in.

His little brother was cute, but nowhere near as good looking or as athletic. But hit puberty at like 10, and over 6in by 12. He ended up almost 7.5in. Still tall, but shorter than his brother at 5' 10".

The older brother though just decided to do what he could with it. He is dating, and said he is very open about it, a few women have turned him down but he has so many other great qualities most don't care, as PIV sex is not the thing a meaningful relationship should be built on.

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During my Sr. year in college I started drinking and dating.  It was the 60s so there was still a lot of sexually conservative girls similar to the one I described above.  As I was a newbie to dating, I didn't end up with the legendary 50s women participating in the "sexual revolution."

I ran into 3 that were quite eager to "make out" but strangely drew the line at their breasts.  After french kissing with another one and full body snuggles fully dressed, I reached under her skirt and found her panties soaking wet.  I reached under the panties and played with her clitoris and vagina which she accepted with only a warning to be gentle as she didn't want to spoil her virginity.  I even got my fingers in her vagina under her pubic bone.  She really liked that and might even have orgasmed for all I knew.  She kept her hand or leg in contact with my erect penis through my pants.

Then, I removed her bra with a surprising slick move and had her big firm breast in my hand.  She became furious, jerking away and slapping my face.  After a lecture from her we we went back to making-out.  After a while we broke open another bottle of wine and sipped it talking about a lot of things.  We talked among other things about how society was getting a lot more sexually liberal, but she explained she didn't want to take the birth control pill because her mother had a bad reaction to the "pill."    She admitted she read Playboy a lot and had learned oral sex was becoming acceptable.  Unbelievably, I failed to understand she was suggesting we indulge in oral sex right then.  I took her mention of oral as just an intellectual point!

Months later a friend found out that I had dated her for a while and wanted to compare notes.  He said she was a great "cocksucker", but was always pushing for reciprocation which "he didn't do, no way!"  I was really stunned and felt like a fool.  I had never thought about women I knew actually sucking cock either.

I ended up marrying the first woman I dated that allowed me to play with her tits.  I probably would have married the first one that sucked my dick, had that happened.

 

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