Changing your neg view of your dick

[canuck45]

On 4/26/2021 at 1:42 AM, wayless said:

Without doubt, what helped me to be more accepting of my size is my wife.

So can I infer that  you had worries/doubts of your penis.  Did you think...inadequate in some way?

[Guest]

30 minutes ago, canuck45 said:

So can I infer that  you had worries/doubts of your penis.  Did you think...inadequate in some way?

Quoted wrong guy I presume?

[canuck45]

4 hours ago, wayless said:

Quoted wrong guy I presume?

yep I did, not sure how I did that though.

[canuck45]

On 4/1/2021 at 1:26 PM, Tsoren said:

Without doubt, what helped me to be more accepting of my size is my wife.

So can I infer that  you had worries/doubts of your penis.  Did you think...inadequate in some way

[canuck45]

On 4/1/2021 at 1:26 PM, Tsoren said:

Without doubt, what helped me to be more accepting of my size is my wife.

So can I infer that  you had worries/doubts of your penis.  Did you think...inadequate in some way

[Tsoren]

3 hours ago, canuck45 said:

So can I infer that  you had worries/doubts of your penis.  Did you think...inadequate in some way

Absolutely.  I had insecurities regarding my sexuality, my penis and women.  And all three of those insecurities came to a head (no pun intended) when this wonderful woman asked me out for my first date when I was 28 years old.  Prior to that, I had never been on a date with a woman and my only sexual experiences were with guys.  I was worried that my penis would not be thick enough to satisfy a woman.  

In spite of all those worries, that first date was fantastic and I had enough nerve to ask her out.  Yada, yada, yada, less than two years later we got married.

But I was very worried regarding the size of my penis.  I knew I had good length, but I also knew it was very thin.  Would it be enough to bring her pleasure?  What if I couldn't bring her to orgasm?  And even more basic, what if I couldn't get hard?  What would she think of my foreskin?  Would she think the way my penis curved was weird?

Fortunately, we talked about our anxieties and we talked about how we could bring pleasure to each other.  And, we were both very open to experimenting.  Through her discussions and her actions, she made me feel much more secure with my penis, and I helped her become much more accepting of her breasts (she thought they were too small, but I thought they were/are absolutely perfect).  

[Guest]

6 hours ago, Tsoren said:

Absolutely.  I had insecurities regarding my sexuality, my penis and women.  And all three of those insecurities came to a head (no pun intended) when this wonderful woman asked me out for my first date when I was 28 years old.  Prior to that, I had never been on a date with a woman and my only sexual experiences were with guys.  I was worried that my penis would not be thick enough to satisfy a woman.  

Yeah, the significantly below average thinness of your penis had slipped my mind.  Valid reason to have doubts. 

And, in case there is doubt, I am happy that you found the right woman as you described.  I guess I might have experienced a tinge of jealousy.  Often, I accept the idea small guys have to accept that even "life partners" won't be interested our dicks and we must "settle" for that.

I think you were really lucky to find the right woman so fortuitously.  I've never found one that showed interest in my penis, but that was certainly at least somewhat my fault for not seeking enough, being too ready to stick for a time with any woman who would continue to have sex with me. 

My standards were a way low due to a negative view of myself and dick.  I guess finding a mate that accepts you "as you are" should be uppermost in ones mind.  I often had the rationalization that with "settling" things will get better over time  Settling for someone embarassed or otherwise dissatisfied with your dick probably doesn't make sense and always got worse over time in my case.

 

Edited April 28, 2021 by Guest

[Hot Showers]

For me, a lot of my confidence comes from my willingess to be naked around other guys in casual situations...locker rooms/communal showers, shared hotel rooms, with friends, hot tubs, etc...basically anywhere that nudity is acceptable. I've been using gyms with open showers for decades, so (except for the last ~14 months), my post-workout routine involves multiple men seeing my penis. I'm aware that most of the other men have larger penises, but it feels incredibly manly to project that my confidence in showing off my penis, regardless of its size

[new2day]

I agree @Hot Showers as I've had similar experience. Aside from early teenage years, I was always playing sports or going to gym, and all the showers back then were open gang style. So there literally was nowhere to hide, you just had to get on with it, strip off, hang your towel and go shower with 6-10 other naked men.

When I look around, I see many like me not showing much, some bigger, some smaller.... the vast majority like me. So I don't miss out, I go to sports clubs and shower with others, nude beaches/naturist clubs are the same, and I do feel empowered by being fearless about who see me naked in these places.

[Guest]

11 hours ago, new2day said:

I agree @Hot Showers as I've had similar experience. Aside from early teenage years, I was always playing sports or going to gym, and all the showers back then were open gang style. So there literally was nowhere to hide, you just had to get on with it, strip off, hang your towel and go shower with 6-10 other naked men.

When I look around, I see many like me not showing much, some bigger, some smaller.... the vast majority like me. So I don't miss out, I go to sports clubs and shower with others, nude beaches/naturist clubs are the same, and I do feel empowered by being fearless about who see me naked in these places.

When there is never "some smaller," it is hard to feel empowered.  However, there is some pride in "doing it anyway."  Sometimes I think I set too high a bar for myself, in this respect, and I would felt better about myself pursuing activities not requiring the "hot showers."

[new2day]

That is the point, you might be the smallest in the room, don't let that stop you taking part or trying something new. Change is good, challenge is good, leave those negative thoughts behind.

[Guest]

48 minutes ago, new2day said:

That is the point, you might be the smallest in the room, don't let that stop you taking part or trying something new. Change is good, challenge is good, leave those negative thoughts behind.

No.  That wasn't your point.  You saw the vast majority "like me."  THAT would be reassuring and I could see it was for the "vast majority" back in my day too.  Just me, and a couple I glimpsed in mandatory gym who, maybe wisely, avoided hot showers.

Edited May 24, 2021 by Guest

[Chris85]

For me, it was a combination of therapy and seeking out situations where I could see other dicks that really helped. I would recommend nude beaches to anyone withe size insecurities. I kept my clothes on the first few times I visited a beach, but after a while of doing this you do realise that you are not so very different from other men.